My Perimenopausal Script

June 9, 9:14 PM

When it comes to understanding my truest desires in love and how they truly feel, clarity often feels like an illusion. How can we see something we don’t know how to address yet? Here exists the quantum conundrum of evolutionary alchemy that transpires within our being, whether we are conscious of it or not. Shall I blame this on my Venus in Capricorn astrological components? Venus in Capricorn women exhibit a blend of practicality, ambition, and sophistication in their approach to love and relationships. They value stability, loyalty, and long-term commitment, often seeking partners who are equally driven and reliable.

The Good:

•   Loyal and Committed: These women are dedicated partners who prioritize long-term relationships.
•   Practical and Grounded: They approach love with a sense of realism and practicality.
•   Ambitious and Hardworking: They are often ambitious and support their partners’ goals.

The Bad:

•   Reserved and Cautious: They can be emotionally reserved, taking time to open up.
•   Perfectionistic: Their high standards can sometimes make them critical.
•   Work-Oriented: They may prioritize career over relationships at times.

The Best:

•   Reliable Partner: Their commitment and loyalty make them dependable partners.
•   Supportive: They offer strong support and encouragement in both personal and professional aspects of life.
•   Elegant and Classy: They often possess a refined and sophisticated demeanor that is appealing.

In essence, a Venus in Capricorn woman values security, dedication, and mutual growth in her relationships, blending her ambitions with a desire for a stable and enduring partnership. Anyhoo, that is neither here nor there, especially when celibacy is my abstinence for years on end. You lose count after year three. Lol, I just don’t be wasting people’s time, especially mine. I feel like when you see someone—you know. You know there is something you desire more to know, and that would be instant. And if it is not met equally on both sides, it’s just a waste of time for everyone involved.

Recycling toxicities should be the furthest thing from all of our minds, bodies, hearts, and souls. I just never could find myself to do it. You know, superficial hookups. Like some part of me has to really sapiosexual you. And even when compatibility speaks, eager is never me to rip one another’s clothes off. I mean, that’s the easiest thing we can do. I’m not kidding you. Fooling around when the circuits are circuiting, it’s electromagnetic firing and highly sought after and desirable. But I’m not with what’s expirable. I tend to make up words. Expirable—something that can easily cancel a previous something out upon an instant. Expirable—it’s now a word. Feel free to use it. I am not interested in what is expirable that is instantly fireable. Another made-up word but worthy to define how it aligns in my life as I script away without much thought, just trust. Now overthinking it because I tuned into it and now take a deep breath in to reconnect with the flow of this freestyle classical beat. Anyhoo, what was I saying? Anything that spreads my soul so thin, I am removed from and do not participate in, standing ten toes deep with that clarification. And so, although romantical I truly am… picky I’ve been called. So be it. It’s a vibe thing. We either vibe or we don’t, and if we don’t, I don’t care how interested you are in me, I won’t be wasting neither of our times. And the truth shall always set me free. That’s how it be. Lenny Kravitz recently came out that he’s ten years celibate. I think he beat me by like two years. Lol, so much respect to his personal journey where he said it was spiritual and he would be intimate with the right person. Which is exactly how I feel too! That’s all I am saying. People be too loosey-goosey out there with themselves. And with as many wrong things I have done in my own life and mistakes I have made and lived through to learn from, I say this knowing that I too am farthest from perfect. But this world needs to bring back some shaming in people’s behaviors because the ridiculousness and lack of self-awareness that exists out there, all the mundane shells of their own existence, so tapped out, tuned into nothing but the static noise out there ruling their vessels—it’s rare when you find a free thinker. And even when you find a free thinker that thinks themselves to be that way too, you hear their trap house loop they partake in too. You begin to learn that we are all caged birds operating from different levels of perceived reality of existence that is apparently individualized, though collective is our domain. It’s hard to restrain from escapism ways that are ingrained in our training that is always evolutionary and ongoing. Here I am trying to make sense of a speck of speck of speck of space of a matter that does matter mixed in batter she still attempts to splatter her matter like the creative creature that she individually is, separate from thee all while attached to thee all by the invisible earth cord that attaches us all by its root with indoctrinated poop—that’s the real scoop if that’s what I am going to say with my perimenopausal waves of perspective that I get more comfortable sharing I’ll open up more about. But seriously… how we care for our entire being/vessel is eternal in every multidimensional perceived reality in every dimension of existence, space, and time on this infinite climb/rise/align.
Forced to get to know thyself, we find ourselves and every self that is within the self of all that is and is not. Peace is a treasure, and the path to embracing it is forever.

And let’s be real for a second—when was the last time you actually saw someone truly embodying peace? It’s like spotting a unicorn in the wild. We all want it, yet we’re all running around like headless chickens half the time. So, here’s a tip: slow down, breathe, and maybe, just maybe, don’t take life so seriously. Because, at the end of the day, we’re all just trying to make sense of this cosmic joke called life.

And with that, I leave you with a wink and a nod. Keep it light, keep it real, and for the love of all things holy, keep it humorous.

till next time my loves 🤍